Grieving the loss of a loved one especially a parent is one of life’s most painful experiences. Yet in today’s fast-paced world, people often feel pressured to “move on” quickly, even when their hearts are still heavy. In a publication published by pafikutaikab.org psychologists emphasize that grief is not a race, but a deeply personal process that unfolds differently for everyone.
According to mental health experts, understanding the natural rhythm of grief is crucial to genuine healing.
Grief Is Not a Linear Process
“People often expect grief to follow clear stages — sadness, acceptance, and then recovery — but real life doesn’t work that way,” explained Dr. Nanda Prameswari, a clinical psychologist from Universitas Indonesia. “Emotions fluctuate. You can feel okay one day and overwhelmed the next. That doesn’t mean you’re failing to heal — it means you’re human.”
Psychologists describe grief as a nonlinear process, where emotions such as anger, denial, guilt, and longing may reappear even months or years after the loss. Trying to suppress or rush these feelings can actually delay healing.
Dr. Nanda added, “There is no deadline for mourning. Grief softens over time, but it never truly disappears it simply becomes part of who we are.”
The Pressure to “Be Strong”
Cultural expectations often influence how people express grief. Many are told to “be strong” for their families, to stay busy, or to distract themselves. While these coping methods can offer short-term relief, they can also prevent emotional processing.
“Pretending to be okay too soon creates emotional tension,” Dr. Nanda said. “You don’t have to smile when you feel like crying. Strength is not about suppressing pain — it’s about allowing yourself to feel it safely.”
This emotional honesty helps prevent complicated grief, a prolonged form of mourning that can lead to depression, insomnia, or social withdrawal.
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Finding Healthy Ways to Cope
Psychologists recommend embracing small, meaningful steps toward healing instead of forcing closure. These include:
- Acknowledging your feelings. Write, talk, or reflect without judgment.
- Maintaining connection. Share memories with friends or family.
- Creating rituals. Lighting a candle, visiting a meaningful place, or keeping a memory journal can honor your loved one’s legacy.
- Seeking support. Therapy or grief counseling can help you navigate complex emotions safely.
Dr. Nanda also reminds that physical health affects emotional resilience. “Eat well, rest, and move your body — even gentle walks can ease emotional fatigue.”
Learning to Live with Loss
Healing from grief doesn’t mean forgetting. Instead, it means learning to live with loss while finding meaning again. Many people eventually transform their pain into compassion, faith, or motivation to help others.
“Acceptance is not about letting go of love,” Dr. Nanda explained. “It’s about realizing that love can continue — just in a different form.”
The Bottom Line
Grief has no timeline, no right or wrong way to feel. Taking time to heal is not a sign of weakness, but of respect for your emotions and for the person you lost.
As Dr. Nanda concluded, “You don’t move on from grief. You move forward with it — and that’s perfectly okay.”
Source: Pafikutaikab
